Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Hide the Women and Children

Lemme tell you how we do things around here. We. Don't. Fuck. Around. We're not like them folks in VA. We don't let a crazy murderer wander around for two hours and not even warn anyone. When we get as little as fucking tranny wandering around near a school we lock shit down. Our kids aren't going to be anywhere near that perversion.

Guns? Meh.


I wish, wish, wish that I was totally making this up.

From the Detroit News...

BLOOMFIELD HILLS -- A lockdown at Cranbrook Schools has been lifted this morning after about an hour of searching for a man reportedly walking near the campus in high-heeled shoes and a wig.

Police were called 8:15 a.m. and officers searched the campus looking for the man, Bloomfield Hills Police said, but did not find him.

The man did not approach students while near the campus. More information about the man and what he was wearing were not available.

Cranbrook officials were not available for comment.

Saturday, April 7, 2007

Detroitster!

You know, I've mentioned the weather in Detroit before and you all probably thought, "whatever, he's just exaggerating." Well, here in pictorial fashion is the difference between April in DC and April in Detroit.

[aside: Sorry for the DC vs. Detroit stuff but it's the most obvious comparison. We were in both places this week]

APRIL IN DC


The sun was shining, the birds were out, the cherry trees were blooming, it was 80 degrees and I was dancing to the Bangles. I know that I once wrote for WIH8DC, but honestly, DC in the spring is pretty goddam nice.



APRIL IN DETROIT


That white stuff? Yeah, it's snow. So much snow in the air that you can't even see. There's nothing like snow in April to make you feel like celebrating re-birth and all that other shit. Happy fucking Easter indeed.

All I have to say about this is that I'm glad that Jesus wasn't crucified in Detroit. On the third day he would have risen from the dead according to the scriptures, rolled the stone away from his grave, looked out at the snow and then he probably would have said "Snow? In April? Screw that, I'm going back to dead."